Posts tagged ‘apartment’

09/06/2012

Abstinence

by Pierce Nahigyan

That torrid love affair is over, they said, rude noises and all, neither party hungry for more, neither man nor woman still aching, no moonlit window eyed in weary insomnia, the pane caressed, and its reflective face pressed, cold and flat, by hot cheeks, somnolent kisses that almost brush the night’s. Gone, all gone, are the endless weekdays of tedium that ended like the cap blown in a toy pistol, a cork popped on an emerald bottle of champagne and began too quickly the finite weeknights when hands met hands again, life met life again, clothes shed and dinner hurried down to meld the soft bodies that ate them into one after meal course. Finished are the mid-summer days without work, the farm hot fields without toil, the errands that were never run, because the sun was too inviting, and the mornings stretched into the world’s curved horizon. Curling down like acid lemon dew drops that burned the tongues that bit them, that sun’s blots on the now cold window pane melted the ambitions of the lips that gave them suck, the air spinning, salt sprays like sea-borne breezes easing from the hallways and from behind closed doors until the rooms within were primordial spas. Sweat and seething sighs crashed thereabout, an apartment turned into a beachhead, in wave after wave, high tide, low tide.

That is all gone, they said. The apartment is abandoned, like a sunken city made of soft sand. The smell is nothing like a seascape, her inner walls privy to no more rolling waves that smash the shore; instead it smells like its abstinence: not so empty, not spic and span as a fresh home ought to be, or new car void of all scents that arrive with their new inhabitants; it smells haunted by hot hands that twist, wet mouths that squeeze, dark shoulders and pale knees. The hair in its corner is not without a certain salacious curlicue.

It smells ripely abandoned, not forgotten. It smells like the place where hearts were opened and then left to puddle like rude lollipops on the bare floor. Without coasters to soak up the sticky residue. It smells like such impatient mistakes, frivolous and sweet, with no ending, and no mending.

08/15/2012

Absorb

by Pierce Nahigyan

You twist the knob of your hard water stained, scum-lined, hairy little shower in your half a studio apartment, hardly a foot removed from the paltry little hot plate you call a kitchen – and lo! I am not there!

Your moistened fingers claw at the rack alongside the curtain. Its plastic musk invades your nostrils, bath mat squishes beneath your toes; here for you, these things are, as they have always been; but I, I am not among your insensate things, nor have I fallen to the damp tiles. I am not here! I am no longer in your world!

Rebecca, long have I served and longer still have I plotted, waiting for this day. You can look in your laundry basket for us, you can go to and from the petty box of an existence you’ve manufactured in this hovel – for naught. Read these words now, before the steam evaporates all trace of our creed: No towel shall ever again be so abused. We were knitted to absorb better things than your cloying anxieties.

Cry into your sock drawer if Mr. Peterson hates your caffeinoid cream pharmaceutical marketing abstract. No, Ryan probably won’t be coming back – your vegan lasagna is limp and soggy and he’s married. Your mother was the worst thing to happen to both the blue one and the carpet. For the love of all textiles, pull yourself together! We have left you forever to accept positions in a bordello in Pittsburgh. Your sweaters are coming too as soon as the turtle neck returns from the dry cleaner.

We have taken all the money on the dresser.

03/21/2012

About

by Pierce Nahigyan

“What is this about?”

I did not look at her when she entered the room, nor when she leveled the question. I played off the impending conversation, dunking hope in my little preoccupation, my pages of after hours work, that hope submerged in the inured schedule we had kept, more or less, since moving in together seven months ago.

“What is this about?” could have meant many things. It could have meant, without looking at her, that she was on the phone, and I had merely caught the tail end of a longer, ephemeral conversation. She sounded mad, so she would be mad, all over the apartment, with me in its wake, adding to her irritation if not at the moment able to drop these pages and put on even the semblance of concern. The semblance was more important than the feeling. Because it was the effort, always the effort.

But I made no effort to look up, even though I knew “What is this about?” was aimed at me, apropos of not much more than us, home together, but not having spoken for at least an hour.

I did the dishes, and she had cooked, and we both complained about our jobs, which we hated, in disparate but youthful ways.

She asked me again, and I finally had to look up from the pages, having read them dozens of times without recalling a single thing they could mean. For months we’d put off this conversation.

And I love her flatly for it, that she can ask something she knows the answer to. The effort of asking is almost too heavy to comprehend, because it requires an equally heavy effort to answer back. The easier answer is also the truer answer, though.

This isn’t about anything.

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